Nerves

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Hi guys,
So today I have been feeling really weird, weirder than normal. I have had an upset and painful tummy and had shivers. I have come to the conclusion that it's my body reminding me that i'm nervous. I know, shock horror. The gasps of disbelieve are audible through the screen...
I am usually a very confident person, I know what I am good at and will give most things a go and try to be confident when doing them, however driving is not one of those things. Let me tell you a tale of my experiences. 
Now, my first driving instructor was, for want of a better word, insane. He took a nervous 17 year old on a 6 lane roundabout on her second lesson, EVER! He used to pull the wheel out of my hand and would shout at me when I did something wrong. Do bare in mind I had about 4hrs experience in a car and I was forced to trust him for 2 hrs a day in a massive, flammable machine hurtling down the road. Needless to say, that didn't last for very long. I would say it was mutual but he was bat shit crazy. 

 My second driving instructor had a bit of a raw deal to be honest. I was shaken up and terrified of driving, I was just working through some PTSD problems and I was severely emotional. Not very good for an autistic man who, when I broke down doing a parallel park, stayed silent whilst I had a panic attack and had the most almighty cry. It went on for about 10 minutes until he said, 'when you're ready move us off'. 

 And then we come to my final driving instructor. He has been amazingly supportive and helped build my confidence up to the level that I am taking my driving test tomorrow!! I honestly can say that without him I wouldn't have even tried and I know I will be eternally grateful. Driving was one of those things that I'd just accepted I'd never be able to do, but as I'm writing this I know I am a good driver. I just hope that nothing goes wrong and the examiner can see that. I need a good night's sleep, which I won't get, and to relax, which is laughable. 
But hey, 'nothing worth having comes easy', right?  


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"For God so loved the world that he gave his only son, that whosoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life" Hi! I'm a 21 year old student, and this blog is here to document my thoughts, feelings and events that happen in my life. I hope you'll enjoy reading them and get some comfort from knowing that you're not alone. So sit back, grab a cup of decaf tea and join me on this journey we call life.

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